Today we are exploring what happens when life reminds us how little we actually control, why questioning your path might be more normal and more important than you've ever given yourself credit for, and how to start listening to that quiet voice inside that's been nudging you all along.

Welcome to Your Next Success, the podcast that helps you break free from paths that no longer fit and step into the life and career you were designed for. I am Dr. Caroline Sangal, and around here we don't believe success is one size fits all. We believe it's personal, powerful, and deeply aligned because the goal isn't to impress the world. It is to live fully as the person you were created to be.

Before we dive in, I want to invite you to simply be here for a moment. Maybe take a deep breath, in through your nose and then let it all go. Today we are talking about the illusion of control. How easily we fool ourselves into believing that we can manage, predict, safeguard every part of our lives, but it's also about something even more intimate, how we respond, not just react. How we learn to truly listen to that still small voice inside that's been whispering:"this isn't it" long before the external storms ever came. By the end of this conversation, my hope is simply that you'll feel a little more clear about what's truly yours to shape and what isn't. And maybe just maybe you'll feel inspired to start nurturing what has been quietly waiting inside you all along. It's humbling, isn't it? How easily we believe that we are in control. That floods literal or metaphorical happen somewhere else, to someone else until they are right at our doorstep, forcing us to see how fragile our illusions really are, and it's not just nature that shatters our illusion of control, it's the layoffs you didn't see coming. It's the relationship that blindsides you, the diagnosis that reroutes everything. We try so hard to build our lives to be secure, predictable, protected, but control is such a delicate thread, and what I want to explore is how that's not entirely bad news because while we may not control the rivers or the storms or the twists of fate, there is something far more profound that is ours to shape. As I was planning out this episode, I came across a story on LinkedIn. It was from Dan Zadra's book, Five: where will you be five years from today? Now I admit I haven't read the whole book, just this fragment that someone posted, but sometimes a fragment is enough to lodge itself deep inside of you. It goes something like this. Picture an old man lying in a quiet room. He knows he's near the end of his life. His breath has that slow uneven rhythm that tells you there aren't many left. The room is dim. Sunlight is trying to reach through the curtains. There's a faint scent of flowers from visitors who came to say goodbye. He's alone with his memories until suddenly the room begins to fill and at first he thinks maybe these are friends from childhood coming to sit with me one last time, and he tries to smile, reaching out a trembling hand. But then one by one, they step closer and he sees that their faces are unfamiliar and they begin to speak."We are your dreams. We are your ideas. We are your talents. We are your untapped potential." Their voices are soft, but somehow fill every corner of the room. They're calm, not angry, not accusing, but there's a sadness there too."We came to you because only you could bring us to life." Take a moment and let that sink in because we all have them, don't we? The things that knock on our hearts in quiet moments. The things that whisper, Hey, remember me, I'm still here. And then these figures, these possibilities lived only in him. They say something that sends a chill through his already fading body,"And now we must die with you because you never acted on us." Can you imagine? To come to the end of your days and realize that all of those ideas, those secret hopes, that art, that difference you were meant to make, dies with you? Because no one else could live them for you? Who's standing in the corners of your mind right now? What unlived dreams are quietly watching, hoping that you'll notice them before it's too late? Is it a book that wants to be written? A place that keeps pulling at your heart, begging you to come explore? A business that could serve people in ways only you can? A relationship that needs tending or one that needs to finally be released so you can both breathe? And here's something even more profound. Maybe it's not about doing at all. Maybe it's about becoming the calmer, kinder version of you who laughs more easily. The parent who's truly present, the human who's less tangled in proving, performing, and chasing, because all of that, that's inside of you too. Waiting, hoping that you will make space for it to come alive. So just notice for a moment what arises in you as I say this? Is there a tightness in your chest, a flutter in your stomach, a warmth, a grief, a spark? All of those are signs that something inside you is stirring something still alive, still possible, still yours. If you were lying there like that old man and your dreams gathered around you, what would they say? Would they thank you for giving them breath, for letting them out into the world? Or would they look at you with soft, aching eyes and whisper:"now we must go with you, because you never chose us." This isn't meant to scare you, it is meant to remind you that there is still possibility, still choice, still meaning to be uncovered right here and now. You are still here, still breathing, still entirely capable of saying yes to what's waiting. And maybe this is exactly why I've been so drawn lately to the work of Cortney McDermott. She is someone I had the privilege to meet almost two months ago at the Women Life and Science Conference I attended in Greenville, South Carolina. Cortney was the keynote speaker that day and her energy and her clarity cut through all the noise I didn't even realize I was carrying. Since we met she's become a friend and a mentor, someone whose ideas keep finding their way back to me exactly when I seem to need them the most. Cortney is known all over the world for guiding people into a new life- expanding relationship with their own minds and bodies. She shared her work on stages like TEDx Mindvalley, Oxford, even on Richard Branson's private island, inviting people to trust their intuition, lead from within and step into spaces of possibility that they may not have explored otherwise. What I love is how she combines neuroscience, timeless wisdom, and grounded practice so that people don't just hear new ideas, they actually feel them, start to embody them, and carry them forward into how they lead and live. In her bestselling books, give Yourself Permission and Change Starts Within You. She speaks directly to this space. Your dreams, your talents, your hidden longings, they are not waiting on perfect timing. They're waiting on you. Waiting on you to give yourself permission, to pause long enough to listen. To decide maybe for the first time in a long time that you don't have to keep living by old scripts. It's okay to question, to pivot, to choose again. Cortney often says that it all starts inside, not out there in your circumstances. Not with who finally recognizes you or how the market moves or what your industry does next. Real lasting change starts within you and the beautiful hard truth is only you can open that door, because once you give yourself that permission, once you start listening, the next piece is just as vital. How do you actually respond instead of just react? How do you trust that still small voice inside long enough to let it guide your next step. Welcome back to the Your Next Success podcast. So after Cortney's reminder that permission starts inside, you might feel something stirring. A quiet urgency, maybe even a bit of panic and here's where most people slip right back into old patterns because when we are confronted with how fragile life really is, when we see how easily everything can change, our brains often default to reacting. We scramble. We grasp for any illusion of control, and we think"I have to fix everything right now. Maybe if I double down at work, I'll feel safe again. Maybe if I just keep pushing this uneasy feeling down, it'll eventually go away." Reaction is fast, tense, and it is driven by fear, urgency that gnawing sense that if you don't do something this instant, it might all fall apart. It's like standing in a flood and trying to push the water back with your bare hands, frantic, exhausting, hopeless. But responding? Responding is something entirely different. Responding is slower. It's rooted. It doesn't ignore the reality of the storm, but it also doesn't let the storm dictate your soul. Responding means choosing your next move from a calm wise place inside. The part of you that knows what actually matters, that sees the bigger picture, and that trusts that you can weather it. So how often have you been reacting when what you really needed was to respond? Responding starts with listening, not to the chaos outside, not to the noise of everyone else's expectations, but to that still small voice inside you. Some people call it gut instinct, some call it intuition. For me, it feels like God's whisper. It's subtle. It's easily drowned out by to-do lists, social media, the constant dopamine hits of staying busy. But if you get quiet enough, if you give even a sliver of space, it's still there. Maybe it's saying,"This isn't it. You were made for more. Why are you spending so much of your precious life chasing someone else's dream?" Slow down. Come back home to yourself. So just pause and notice what comes up, what comes up in your body as I ask. What about your dreams, your longings? What about the possibility of choosing a new way? Do you feel something tighten or lighten? Is there a tug in your heart, a flutter in your belly? Because often your body knows long before your mind catches up. I've seen this over and over with people that I work with, high achievers, leaders, parents, dreamers, students. They come to me because on the outside they're holding it all together, but on the inside there is a quiet ache. A sense that they've been reacting their entire lives, checking boxes, hitting goals, and trying to control everything so that they feel safe and yet somehow still feeling strangely unsafe because reacting doesn't build security. It just creates more spinning. And maybe in all that doing, they haven't actually stopped to ask what they really want. Maybe they don't know what's next, or they've been following someone else's definition of success, a version that never really fit but felt safer than questioning it. What about them? Their voice, their thoughts? Their vision for what life could be, and what about you? Your voice, your thoughts, your dreams, and your vision for what life could be? Responding on the other hand, it's where everything starts to change. Responding, invites you to pause, to feel, to listen, to decide what actually matters and move from there. I want to show you how all of this, the reacting, the quiet ache, the wondering what is truly yours, ties into something almost everyone wrestles with. Questioning your career, your path, your very definition of success. Because maybe right now you are in a season of questioning. Maybe it feels like uncertainty or even like failure. But what if it's none of those? What if it is simply the doorway to something far more aligned? Let's lean into this next layer together, because maybe right now you may be feeling unsettled, like you're standing in a hallway between what's been and what could be. Maybe you've been questioning your career, wondering if the ladder you've been climbing is even leaning against a wall that you truly want to scale. Or maybe it's bigger than that. Maybe it's your entire life's rhythm that feels off, like something important is missing, even if you can't name it yet. Here's what I really want you to hear and take in at the deepest level. Feeling unsettled, questioning your path, wondering if all this striving is really leading somewhere meaningful, doesn't mean something's wrong with you. It doesn't mean you failed. It doesn't mean you're ungrateful. It actually means you are awake to your own life. You care enough to pay attention. That you are exactly where you need to be to start exploring what could be even more aligned, more alive, and more fully yours. Because the truth is, questioning your path, including your life and career is part of being fully alive. In all my research about career changes I've learned questioning your career is normal. And it happens at remarkably predictable times. We can call them turning points. Now, these are natural cycles where life seems to pause, look you in the eyes and say,"are you sure? Do you wanna keep going this way? Or is it time to shift?" For many people, this questioning starts at around 18, when you're suddenly expected to pick a major, a path, an entire future, then it hits again around age 22. You're fresh out of school, and when you move from ideas into reality and realize, wait, is this really what I want? Is this who I want to be? And then it continues every seven to 10 years. It's like a built in life review, and it shows up whether your life looks wildly successful on paper or is still a work in progress. These moments aren't failures. They are invitations. Sometimes they arrive after you've achieved something big. The job title you chased for years, the milestone house, the long anticipated income level, and then instead of the lasting fulfillment that you expected, there's this quiet, almost embarrassing letdown."Is this all? Is this it?" Or it happens when your kids reach new stages, they start driving, they graduate, they move out, and suddenly you are standing in a quiet kitchen. Realizing you poured so much of yourself into raising them, that you lost pieces of your own identity along the way. Or maybe it's driven by a change you didn't choose. A layoff. A reorg, an industry shift that leaves your once sought after skills, feeling dated overnight, or a health scare that makes you and your own mortality uncomfortably real. I've seen this again and again with the people that I've worked with, high performers, leaders, people who, from the outside, look dialed in, accomplished and secure. But inside there's a gentle or sometimes screaming question,"is this really what I want? Is this the impact I am meant to make? Is this how I wanna feel day after day, year after year?" And here is what's so achingly human. Most people assume that if they're questioning things, then they must have screwed up somewhere, or worse that they're ungrateful because with all of their accomplishments, shouldn't they just be happy? Seriously? Other people would give anything to have what they have. what if this questioning is your next evolution? What if this stirring, this relentlessness isn't a problem to be fixed, but an invitation to be followed? What if it's your soul's way of tapping you gently on the shoulder and saying,"Hey, I have more for you, but you'll need to let go of some old pieces to receive it." This is why these moments feel so unsettling, because questioning threatens the identity you've carefully built, the plans that you've clung to, the safety that you've tried so hard to manufacture. But it's also exactly where all the real magic starts when you can choose to respond, not just react to truly listen, not just numb out, to move forward from a deep place of alignment instead of habit or fear. So let me just ask you softly, what stage of life are you in right now? What dreams or questions have been circling your mind lately? Maybe at 2:00 AM when you're too tired to hold the guardrails up. What would it look like to honor that curiosity instead of shoving it down? Because if this is you, know that you don't have to keep sleepwalking through a life that doesn't quite fit anymore. You can pause, reassess, realign, and the beautiful truth. You can do this at any age, any stage, with any amount of past success or failure behind you. It is never too late to ask better questions, to pivot, to begin again. And yes, the answers ultimately come from inside you. They always do. But I've also learned that sometimes it helps to talk through it with someone, someone who has walked this road with many others who can hold a safe space for you to unravel old patterns or offer a framework that helps you see yourself more clearly. So here's your gentle invitation. If you ever want to explore your life and career more deeply, whether it's through an honest conversation or with tools that can help you uncover and discover what's next, I would be honored to walk alongside you because this is your one life. You are still here, still breathing, still entirely capable of saying yes to what's waiting. So let's go even closer to the heart of all of this because we've talked about reacting versus responding about questioning your career, your path, your life. But how do you actually know what's right for you? What's next? What's real versus another shiny distraction? You start by listening to the still small voice inside you. Call it your gut, your intuition, your inner knowing, or for some of us it's unmistakably the quiet whisper of God. It's been there your entire life, gently nudging you when something doesn't feel right. Lighting up when something did feel right. It's the tiny tightening in your stomach when you're about to say yes to something that you know isn't aligned. It's the soft open expansion in your chest when an opportunity feels perfectly timed, even if it scares you a little. But here's the thing. most of us have gotten really good at ignoring it because listening often means facing discomfort. It might ask you to change course, to leave something familiar, to admit that what you've built as shiny and impressive as it may look on LinkedIn, isn't actually feeding your soul, and that's terrifying. So we drown it out with endless podcasts, social feeds, wine at night, busyness that looks productive, but mostly keeps us from sitting still. Because stillness is where the voice gets loud. Stillness is where you hear this, isn't it. You are capable of so much more than this safe little box. It's time. So just take a moment with me right now. Maybe even close your eyes if that feels safe. Take a slow breath in and let it go. Ask yourself quietly, what have I been pretending not to know? Where has my gut been guiding me that I keep ignoring? What gentle invitations have I brushed off as impractical, too risky or not for me? Because here's what I believe and what I've seen over and over with people that I work with. Your soul is endlessly patient. It'll keep tapping you on the shoulder again and again offering gentle course corrections and whispers like try over here, maybe that door, say yes this time! It will try a thousand small ways to get your attention before life has to get loud. And then, even when storms rise and illusions of control get stripped away, it's not always a punishment. Sometimes it's the only way left to clear the noise so that you finally listen. So you'll finally remember what you actually wanted and who you actually are. So just keep noticing what your body is telling you, even as we close today, maybe there's a tightness, maybe there's a lightness. Maybe there's something that just quietly says, yes, pay attention here. Today we explored what it means to reach for control and realize how little we actually hold. We talked about reacting versus responding and how so often our frantic doing is just a way to keep from feeling what needs to be felt. We unpacked what it means to question your life and your path, not as a failure, but as the most natural human invitation to grow. And we circled all the way back to that still small voice inside you. The one that's been there all along, waiting for you to finally listen. And if at any point you feel ready to explore this more, whether it's simply through a real honest conversation or by using some of the gentle frameworks that help bring all of this into clearer focus, I'd be honored to hold that space with you. You can find me at nextsuccesscareers.com or just reach out directly. Truly, I love hearing people's stories, their raw questions and the tender edges of the dreams that they're not sure they're allowed to name. So thank you for being here today. Thank you for listening, not just to me, but to yourself, because that quiet voice inside you, it's patient, it keeps nudging you toward what's most fully, beautifully yours and if you are willing, slow down, get still and trust it. Until next time, keep asking what's true for you. Keep listening and keep becoming exactly who you are meant to be. Keep going. You're not done yet.

Thanks for listening to Your Next Success with Dr. Caroline Sangal. Remember, authentic success is yours to define and includes aligning your career to support the life you want.